


Sinnregin

by QueenOfCarrotFlowers



Series: Carrot's Horror Stories [22]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Amnesia, Animal Death, Blood, Cults, F/M, HEA, Kidnapping, Knives, Lovecraftian, Mass Death, Mass death includes children, No people of color die, Past Brainwashing, Soulmates, The tags are nasty but the story is hopeful, Thriller, Untagged Characters - Freeform, White Supremacy, inspired by The Shadow Over Innsmouth, mentions of human sacrifice, mentions of torture, untagged background ships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-24
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:48:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 16,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26255905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenOfCarrotFlowers/pseuds/QueenOfCarrotFlowers
Summary: He awoke in a small, round room, white-walled and illuminated by bright sunlight. The soft sound of surf flowed in through the open windows that lined the curved walls, and a gentle breeze carried with it the slightly sour scent of saltwater and decay. There was a woman sitting in a chair across the room, gazing out one of the windows. Her hair was pulled back in three small buns forming a line down the back of her head, and when she turned towards him he was struck by two things: first, that she was beautiful, and second, that he knew her.Every five years the Kylo Ren comes ashore on Ahch-To, carrying a map and searching for the Lighthouse Keeper. The Community depends on their sacrifices to satisfy the demands of Sinnregin.Sinnregin are the Savior; they keep the people safe.Written for the Reylo Fanfiction Anthology with the themetsunami.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Series: Carrot's Horror Stories [22]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2175285
Comments: 84
Kudos: 56
Collections: Reylo After Dark, To Rapture the Earth and the Seas: the 2020 Reylo Fanfiction Anthology





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is a bit of a thriller, please mind the tags before reading. There will be a note about the cult added at the end of chapter two.
> 
> Thanks to flypaper_brain, as always, for the beta and the friendship, thanks to HarpiaHarpyja for the alpha read, and thanks to Viv and Victoria from the RFFA for their feedback. Thanks to all the RFFA editors for organizing the Anthology!

He awoke in a small, round room, white-walled and illuminated by bright sunlight. The soft sound of surf flowed in through the open windows that lined the curved walls, and a gentle breeze carried with it the slightly sour scent of saltwater and decay. There was a woman sitting in a chair across the room, gazing out one of the windows. Her hair was pulled back in three small buns forming a line down the back of her head, and when she turned towards him he was struck by two things: first, that she was beautiful, and second, that he knew her.

It hurt to breathe. His chest was tight and his mouth and throat tasted strange, like salt and minerals. The woman stood and came to him; her smile was broad and sincere, and it brought out dimples in her sun-kissed cheeks.

"How are you feeling, Kylo Ren?"

Her voice was pleasant, musical, and she spoke with a strange accent that was almost but not quite German. It was desperately familiar to him; he knew her voice, and he loved it.

She reached out, as though to touch him, although her fingers didn't quite reach.

"It's so good to finally see you," she breathed, her face full of longing that made his cheeks fill with heat.

"Where am I?"

He'd found his voice. It was painful, but he could speak. The words were there. The blanket under his fingers was scratchy and warm, but the sheets were soft. The clothes he was wearing - white, and certainly not his own - were also soft.

"You're in a bedroom, in a lighthouse - my lighthouse, but not for much longer - on the island of Ahch-To," she answered. "In a small bay, off the Northwest coast of the island of Newfoundland, Newfoundland and Labrador, Canada, North America, the planet Earth." She grinned at him; her teeth were surprisingly white and straight.

"How did I get here? Why don’t I remember arriving?" His memory was foggy, so foggy.

"Washed up on the beach last night, like you always do. You carried the map from Sinnregin. Don't you remember?"

He tried. He tried to remember, but there was nothing. He certainly didn’t know who or what _Sinnregin_ was. He closed his eyes again and concentrated, and he realized that there were things that he knew. He knew her face, which was vaguely familiar, and her voice; and he didn’t know how or why, but he loved them. He was sure he loved them, loved _her_.

But even so, nothing she said made sense, and he was afraid.

She seemed to sense his frustration.

"Do you remember me?"

That question was easier for him to answer, less painful, and it distracted him from his sense of rising panic.

"No. I mean, yes. Maybe. I know your face, and your voice. But I don't think we've met. How do I know you?"

"In dreams," she said, as though it made sense. "Since I was five, so for fifteen years?" She tucked her hands into the pockets of her worn blue coveralls and frowned. "Do you not remember? You’re supposed to remember." She huffed, her eyes shining with unshed tears. “Kylo Ren _always_ remembers the Lighthouse Keeper.”

He tried and failed to sit up; she didn't make a move to help him. After figuring that wasn't going to happen he laid back down with a groan.

"I don't remember anything. Who are you? What dreams? Why do you call me Kylo Ren?"

The woman pushed herself up on her toes, an action which could have been playful or nervous, or perhaps a little of both. Her voice shook.

"I'm Kira, _your_ Kira. I am the Lighthouse Keeper of Ahch-To."

There was something about the way she said it that implied that her title was meant to be capitalized. He shrugged, and she stomped her foot.

“Still nothing?”

“Not a thing, sorry.” He was torn between amusement and sadness. She was so frustrated, and it was cute, but it was also obviously hurting her. She continued quickly, as though she was repeating something she’d read from a book and adding commentary as she did.

"I am the Lighthouse Keeper of Ahch-To, at least until the Ceremony. We are bound by dreams, you and I. The Lighthouse Keeper and Kylo Ren. I don't really understand how it works, and I don't have time to explain what I do understand because I need to go tell the rest of them that you are awake. The Ceremony has begun, now that you’re conscious, and we need to keep up with it. I call you Kylo Ren because you're Kylo Ren." She tilted her head to the side. "Unless there's another name you'd prefer me to call you?"

He wracked his brain, but there was nothing there aside from the last five minutes and dim memories of the woman - Kira - her voice and hair and dimples. There was a brief glimpse of her naked body writhing in the moonlight, but that could have been his overactive imagination. He shuddered and shook his head.

"No," he replied. "Kylo Ren is fine."

"At least that's right,” she said cryptically, relieved, and leaned towards him, reaching out her right hand. The slight unease that had started when she first smiled and had been building through their entire interaction spiked in his chest, but if Kira noticed she didn’t show it.

“Now, you need to rest. I'll be back in a bit, okay? You'll be safe here."

Before he could ask why he might be unsafe, her fingers caressed his forehead and he was thrust into darkness.

* * *

_Kira?_

_Kylo Ren? What are you doing here?_

_You said we knew each other in dreams, so I must be dreaming. Are you asleep too?_

_No. I’m meeting with The Elders. We’re talking about the Ceremony._

_What’s the Ceremony? Will you tell me? I’m afraid._

_You’re not supposed to know. It might not work, if you know. **How are you talking to me**?_

_What might not work?_

_Sinnregin. Sinnregin, they keep us safe…_

_What the hell?_

_Go away! Just go away._

* * *

Kira had successfully pushed Kylo Ren out of her head during her meeting with The Elders; it had been more distressing than she’d anticipated. There were signs - concerning signs - and the stress was beginning to build, for the first time during her term. They had asked her questions about Kylo Ren’s state of mind, and she had smiled and answered “Yes” when she probably should have answered “No” and she didn’t understand why she’d lied to them. They trusted her not to lie. But the Ceremony was happening and he would awaken again soon, and she had to be present with the others when he did. She had enough time to change into her dress and gather the girls before she made it back to the room - and just in time, too. The five of them had lined up neatly at the foot of the bed and not a few seconds later, Kylo Ren was awake.

As his eyes opened and he finally sat up, leaning against the headboard and gazing at her, she couldn’t help but think again that he wasn’t at all what she’d expected. Previous Kylo Rens, although varying in age and physical details, had been soft. She’d only personally met three, but she knew that deference was historically the defining factor of these men. The last one had been tall and skinny and docile, immediately taken with the girl that year - it had been Gilda, only five years before. He had hardly spoken and followed her like a dog, and had given in to the Ceremony willingly, happily.

That had resulted in five years of prosperity, during which Kira and all the other island dwellers had thrived.

Five years before that, Kylo Ren had been young; not very much older than the Lighthouse Keeper - Helga - herself. He was more uncertain, but a few conversations with Helga was all it took before he, too, had fully acquiesced to the experience.

The one before him she barely remembered; it was the year she was selected as Kira, out of the three girls her age, and Kylo Ren that year had been too old to be interesting to her. She remembered him as being grandfather age, with greying hair and wrinkles around his eyes, which deepened when he smiled at his Lighthouse Keeper, who had also been called Kira. After the Ceremony that year, a little girl whose name has long been forgotten had her first dream with her own Kylo Ren, and she’d been selected as the new Lighthouse Keeper and had been christened Kira herself.

She didn’t remember that Ceremony at all, being both excited about what would happen if she were appointed as Lighthouse Keeper, and afraid of what would happen if she wasn't, but surely she would recall if anything unusual had happened.

However, Kira had never heard of Kylo Rens and Lighthouse Keepers conversing in their minds outside of dreams. That was unexpected, and she couldn’t decide if she liked it or not. She _did_ like the way he looked; she had decided that immediately, when she’d fished him out of the water the night before, pulling him up the beach and examining him by the light of her torch and the bright moon, almost full.

It had always struck her as a little unfair, that her Kylo Ren could see her in the dreams but that she couldn't see him. She'd asked him to describe himself to her many times, and he'd used terms like _awkward_ and _goofy_ , but he was wrong. _Beautiful_ , was the first word that came to her mind, even with his hair - dark, and long enough to cover his ears, which were on the large side - sopping and stuck to his skull. His nose was large and his mouth was large and he was very, very large and she wanted him to wrap her up and keep her safe, which was ridiculous. She didn’t exist to be kept safe; she existed to keep the island safe. It was her only task, her sole responsibility. But still, she wanted her Kylo Ren in a way she didn’t expect to, in a way she’d never wanted anyone before. She'd given him so much of herself, in their shared dreams, and she was heartbroken that he had forgotten.

Now he was staring at her, from his place on the bed, and it was her responsibility to prepare him. The first step, according to the ritual text gifted to them by Sinnregin, was to introduce him to the future Lighthouse Keepers.

“Kylo Ren,” she said, with her practiced smile, hoping that he couldn’t sense her nervousness. “So good to see you awake again. The Successors want to meet you.”

His gaze didn’t move away from her, and he was silent for several moments.

“You’re beautiful,” he murmured. She flushed; she’d changed into a white dress of stiff fabric embroidered around the bodice, sleeves, and skirt with the many arms of Sinnregin. Her hair had been braided and wrapped around her head, although the seaweed wouldn't be added until later, right before The Community would send them out for the matrimonial service. She fancied she looked quite nice, as all the previous Lighthouse Keepers had looked very nice in preparation for their own Ceremonies, but she was surprised how pleased she was to hear him say it. Kira’s face heated, her cheeks and nose and ears, and saw with pleasure that Kylo Ren’s face glowed with heat, too.

Suddenly he was there again, in her head, speaking to her without making a sound.

 _What is the Ceremony_?

Kira hoped that she successfully masked her alarm. Instead of answering in her mind, she spoke.

“This is Helga,” she said, gesturing to the girl standing next to her. Helga had been selected when Kira herself was ten and Helga was five, and for the past five years Kira had been training her in the care of the lighthouse, much as Gilda had trained her for the five years leading up to her own term as Lighthouse Keeper.

“And this is Gilda.” Gilda, on the other side of Helga, was another five years younger. Twenty, fifteen, ten; as it always was and always would be, the Lighthouse Keeper and her Successors. On the other side of Gilda were three children. Tonight, after the Ceremony, one of them would dream of her Kylo Ren, and would be appointed a future Lighthouse Keeper, and would be christened Kira, to replace Kira, who would be gone. Kira was fond of them.

She remembered when they’d arrived on Ahch-To five years before, along with the Daughter and the Son, a few days after the Ceremony that had finally seen her appointed as Lighthouse Keeper. She was a bit sad that she wouldn’t get to meet the new babies this year. She avoided thinking about what would happen to the two who weren't selected this year. “And this is Astrid, Evy, and Nina.”

“Hello, Kylo Ren!” The girls called out in unison, finishing with a giggle. “We’ll be the Lighthouse Keepers when Kira is gone,” the girl Kira had called Gilda added helpfully, and Kira cringed internally.

Kylo Ren’s face was impassive, but the voice in her head was full of distress. _What the **fuck** is going on? Lighthouse Keepers? Ceremony? Talk to me, Kira. Tell me what’s happening._

His words dropped into her head altogether, more like a thought than a conversation, and Kira’s smile faltered. She quickly shooed the giggling girls out of the room, and when she came back to the bed, she was shaking.

* * *

Even flustered, even - he expected - brainwashed, this woman was beautiful. She was also upset, and unable to contain it, and he felt bad for her.

“You’re not supposed to be like this!” Kira snarled at him, even as she controlled her voice to keep it quiet, and threw her hands up in the air. “You’re supposed to be _happy to see me_. Why are you not happy to see me?”

There were tears in the corners of her eyes, and he reached out his hand to take hers. She accepted it reluctantly, and his touch seemed to comfort her. He tugged her closer until she seated herself on the edge of the mattress, next to his hip. A gust of chilly air blew in through the window closest to the bed and they both shivered. She was clearly upset; whatever this was, it was not going as she expected it to. But as long as he could keep her _here_ , instead of running off to _there_ \- to explain the situation to whoever the _Elders_ were - he could be safe, at least for a while. Maybe for longer. Maybe they could both be safe.

“I am happy to see you,” he said, surprised that it wasn't a lie, “but this is all very unexpected. You have to understand, I don’t remember anything, except for this morning, and that you look familiar, and that I love you.”

He didn’t understand how you could love someone you didn’t really know and had only seen in dreams that you didn’t even remember, but that didn’t seem to be the most important thing right now. The statement definitely made her happy, if her watery smile and blushing cheeks were anything to go by, and it was worth it for him to say them if only for her reaction.

“However,” he continued, “I don’t know my own name. I don’t know where I came from. I don’t know who might be waiting for me, wherever I came from. Do you understand? Why that might upset me?”

“Nobody’s waiting for you,” she replied quietly, sniffling through her tears. “I’m all you have.”

He wasn’t sure what to think of that, so he rubbed his thumb against the back of her hand and it seemed to calm her.

“But to your other point, I do,” she said. “I do understand. Why it might upset you. Not knowing. But I don’t understand why you don’t remember your dreams. We’ve talked in your dreams. You know everything about me, and I know everything about you.”

“I’m glad one of us does. Will you tell me about myself? Why I’m alone?"

Another stiff breeze blew through the window, and Kylo glanced out to see clouds rolling in, the golden sunlight from earlier quickly turning grey. The horror written in Kira’s eyes was absolute.

"It is forbidden," she whispered. "I don't think I could, even if I wanted to."

"I'm not supposed to remember myself, then?”

She shook her head. “No. And you’re not supposed to care, either. Kylo Ren never cared before.”

“Why not?”

She frowned, thinking. “I don’t know, I never thought about it. I suppose, once you’re here and the Ceremony is underway, there’s no need for you to remember where you’ve come from. The Ceremony is the only thing that matters now.”

"Wait, you're horrified at the thought of telling me about myself, yet you don't know why it's so important that I _not_ know? Doesn't that seem strange to you?"

She didn't answer, instead she gazed at their hands, clasped between them.

“What if I want to remember?”

Her thoughtful silence filled the room. “I don’t know. I’m sorry.”

“Okay,” he said, gently. “Now that you’ve calmed, and you understand why I might be just a little bit upset, can you tell me about yourself? We seem to have a little time. All I know is your name, and that you call yourself the Lighthouse Keeper, but I don’t know what that means.”

She glanced back at the door nervously, and then out of one of the windows. “We do have a little time before the Elders arrive, but there’s not much to say. I’m Kira, the Lighthouse Keeper. I trim the wick, I polish the lens, I tend to the foghorn. It is my duty to the Community. That’s what I do. It’s why I’m here.”

Kylo Ren narrowed his eyes at her. “Was that a description that you memorized?”

Kira’s cheeks heated in embarrassment. “Part of it, yes.”

“Okay. So, what do you do for fun?”

She looked at him as though he’d asked if she knew what dog meat tasted like.

“For fun?”

“Yeah. Do you watch movies, or read, or, I dunno, knit?”

She frowned. “The Lighthouse Keeper is absolved from most responsibilities outside of keeping the lighthouse, so I don’t have to help with the cooking or clothes making, but the lighthouse keeps me very busy; I don’t have a lot of time for things like that. We read the sacred texts in the evening, but I wouldn’t call that ‘fun’. I have heard of movies and television but we don’t have them, and we aren’t allowed to go to the mainland. The Reverend has a radio and some evenings if we’ve been good we get to listen to music - but only if he’s there.” She raised her eyebrows at him and shrugged. “How’s that?”

He squeezed her hand. “Honestly? Not fun.”

“Is there anything you’d like to do, that you haven’t?”

She glanced towards the window, and then leaned towards him and whispered, as though telling him a great secret. “I’d like to go to the mainland and visit a forest. We have a forest here, it covers most of the island, but the island itself is only a few miles long, and the mainland is so much bigger. You told me once about a forest with trees as wide as a house, that reach to the sky, and since then I’ve always wanted to see them. The only big thing here is the ocean, and it frightens me. I’d like to be surrounded by sky trees, and never have to see the ocean again.” She leaned back in a smile, but the excited intensity of her expression stayed.

“Giant Redwoods,” he said. His thumb had continued their gentle rotations across the back of her hand. “All the way on the other side of the continent. I’ve seen them, haven’t I? I visited out there one summer. They don’t quite reach the sky, but they come close.”

She offered him a satisfied smile and squeezed his hand. “How about you?” She said it in a way that implied she already knew the answer, and he supposed that she did, but he thought about it and did his best to answer.

“It’s funny, I don’t remember, but I can tell you that I enjoy reading, and being outside.” He chuckled. “Redwoods, you know.”

Kira smiled at that, and whispered. “You do; you’ve told me. You enjoy hiking in the woods, and writing pretty words, and gardening. You have a garden.” As she said it, images came into his mind. Rose bushes along an old picket fence; little bottles of colorful inks next to a jar full of pens; a tunnel made of pine trees, rocky ground and the ocean visible beyond, with the sound of rain surrounding but very little water reaching the ground. He couldn’t tell if they were his own memories returning, or thoughts coming from her into him. Maybe it was neither. Maybe it wasn’t their magic connection; maybe it was his own brain filling in blanks.

She watched him carefully and bit her lip. “I shouldn't have said that; it is forbidden, but it was such a little thing. Do you remember?”

“I don’t know if it’s a memory or not. I can see roses, ink, and a forest by the ocean.”

Kira gasped, and a tear escaped, rolling gently down her left cheek.

"The tunnel of pines?"

"Yes, pine branches draped over a path, the ocean peeking through. It's very dim."

"The others are yours, the roses, your pens. But the other one, that's mine," she whispered. "That path is here on Ahch-To. You are seeing my memory."

They sat in silence, staring at each other. Eventually she spoke again.

“Do you remember me now?” Her voice was hopeful, but her face fell as he shook his head no.

“It’s just very strange,” she muttered. “You’re remembering and forgetting the wrong things. This isn't working the way it's supposed to.”

“I don’t know. I’m glad I’m remembering more of myself. And I think it's good that we can talk without other people hearing us, that I can see what's in your head. But we have something else we need to talk about: what is the Ceremony?”

She opened her mouth in alarm at the sudden change of topic, but he interrupted before she could say anything. “I _know_ you said that Kylo Ren isn’t supposed to know, but I think it’s only fair that I understand what I’m going to have to do before I do it. Don’t you agree?”

Kira looked miserable, but nodded, and he was struck again by how beautiful she was, and how familiar, and how he was certain he loved her even though he didn’t know her at all. His heart hurt for her, but also - he had a bad feeling about whatever this Ceremony was. That other girl - Helga? Gilda? - had said something about Kira _being gone_ and that didn’t make him happy one bit. He didn’t want to live in a world where Kira was gone, he wanted her right here with him. And Kira being gone didn't imply much good about his own long-term survival, either.

After several moments of silence, he tried again. “Kira. Please. Tell me.”

"You are the Lighthouse Keeper. You keep the island safe from the wrath of Sinnregin _._ Sinnregin requires sacrifice."

Her voice was soft and dreamy, but the words were practiced, as though she was reciting a well-known story. She gazed across the room as she spoke.

“Every five years, on the night before the sixth full moon of the year, Kylo Ren will wash up on the beach. He will carry a map, gifted to him by Sinnregin. You will take the map from him without looking at it and you will take it to the Elders. You will prepare Kylo Ren for the Ceremony. He will be dressed comfortably and treated as a guest. You will introduce him to your Successors, and to the Elders, and to the Community. They will rejoice. You will go with him into the forest, taking the Dagger of Dagon with you; together with the Successors you will follow the way of the map. When you arrive at the place, with the Successors as witness, you will spill your blood together. This shall be your Sacrament of Matrimony.”

At the mention of spilling blood he gasped, but Kira didn’t seem to notice.

“You will consummate your marriage in the way that humans do. When Kylo Ren has spilled, you shall strike him down, and then yourself.”

“And thus begins five years of abundance.”

Her eyes flicked back to him when she was done. “That is the Ceremony. It is demanded by Sinnregin. They are the Savior; they keep us safe.”

He shook his head. “No.”

“You can’t say no,” she whispered. “If we don’t do the Ceremony, Sinnregin will strike us down. They are jealous and vengeful.”

“I don’t care,” he said. “I’m not dying for you or for anyone. And I don’t want you to die, either. Kira,” he leaned towards her and pulled her closer. “Come with me. Let’s go together. Let’s leave.”

The expression on her face was one of pure horror, and she pulled away, grasping her hand against her chest as though it had been burned.

“ _No_ ,” she snarled. “It would never work. And… the island, of course,” she added lamely.

 _It could work, though_.

He spoke directly into her mind, without moving his lips. She looked startled, but answered him the same way.

_They would know._

_We could sneak away as we’re following the map. Can you swim? We could swim to the mainland_.

She bit her lip, her eyebrows drawing together adorably.

 _Not without the other girls_. _The Successors._

_Why the other girls?_

_They are like me._

_What do you mean by that?_

_They are Outsiders._

_Outsiders? What do you mean?_

_I can’t tell you. Not now. No time. The Elders will be here soon._

_Fair enough. If we can get the other girls to come?_

Kira paused, and he was afraid that she was changing her mind, until her voice came in his head again.

_We’ll stay together? Do you promise? After we leave?_

_I promise. You’ll help me figure out who I am and I will bring you home with me, you and the girls too, we’ll be together, for always._

She continued to look hesitant, until he reached out his hand and stroked her cheek.

“I love you, Kira,” he whispered, drawing her face closer to his. “I don’t understand how, but I do. And I am looking forward to having the rest of our lives to get to know each other. But we need to get off this island first. Okay?”

She was so close, and so beautiful, and her lips were so pink; he closed the space between them, and kissed her. She gasped against his mouth, but didn’t pull away. It was an unfamiliar sensation, and he wondered if it was his first kiss. He was very sure it was hers.

It was a nice kiss, comfortable, and he had just started to lean into it when Kira broke it, pulling quickly away.

“Kylo Ren, I want to tell you…”

But whatever she wanted to tell him was interrupted by movement in the hallway, and the turning of the doorknob.

_The Elders!_

Kira’s thought was distressed, but he was surprised to discover that in addition to hearing it he could actually _feel_ her distress as though it were his own. Experimentally he thought calming thoughts - flowers in a garden, dancing in a warm breeze - and sent them to her. She gasped and glanced at him quickly before stepping away and turning to face the door, smoothing down her skirt as she waited. And he, Kylo Ren, he steeled himself to meet The Elders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The fic is three chapters total, I'll post chapter two on Wednesday. Please subscribe if you don't want to miss it.
> 
> As always, let me know here or on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/flowerofcarrots) or [CuriousCat](https://curiouscat.qa/flowerofcarrots) if you have questions or if you think I should add additional tags.
> 
> If you enjoyed this chapter please leave a comment or kudos, I appreciate them so much!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please reread the tags, many of them come into play in this chapter.
> 
> I have added two new tags since posting chapter one: Knives and Blood.
> 
> There's a note about the cult in the End Notes, but I think it's a bit spoilery, so I suggest that you wait until after you read the chapter to read it. 
> 
> Enjoy! I'll post chapter three on Saturday.

Things were happening fast. They were happening too fast, and Kira was working very hard to keep up. She had thought she knew how the Ceremony was going to go but she had been wrong, so very wrong. It was supposed to be straightforward, he was supposed to remember her and she was supposed to tell him what to do and he was supposed to do it. But instead he questioned her at every step; and even worse, he had her questioning things, too. He had her convinced to leave the island - the only home she’d ever known. Her family. Her responsibility. The thought of leaving with Kylo Ren and being with him was terrifying and exhilarating. _He_ was terrifying and exhilarating.

They had kissed, and it had been nice; her first kiss, and his too, she knew. The Lighthouse Keepers were technically allowed to date the boys in the village, to kiss and even have sex with them, as long as they avoided pregnancy, and she suspected that at least one of her predecessors had done so, but Kira had never been interested. There was something about the village boys that was unappealing, especially as she grew older, and closer to her Kylo Ren. She hadn’t had to wait for him for anything other than the good of the village, but she had wanted to. And she was glad.

The kiss had done something else, though; Kira was surprised to discover that not only could she communicate with him outside of dreams, but after pressing her lips against his, his emotions were present for her. He was afraid, and anxious, but also full of love. It seemed that he could sense her emotions too, because hearing the Elders in the hall had upset her, in a way their presence never had before. But immediately a sense of calmness, of restoration, settled in her - like rubbing a sore muscle, only in her heart. She was certain it was coming from Kylo Ren. 

_Thank you, Kylo Ren. Now smile and stay quiet, and all will be well._

Like the Lighthouse Keepers, the Elders were appointed by Sinnregin themselves. Unlike the Lighthouse Keepers, who were girls drawn from Outside, the Elders were boys drawn from The Community. Every ten years, a new Elder was ritually appointed. This year there were seven, ranging in age from fifteen to seventy-five. As they shuffled through the door and arranged themselves around the end of the bed - a mockery of the configuration the girls had stood in only minutes earlier - Kylo Ren's voice spoke clear in Kira's head, along with a disgust that was visceral in its repugnance.

_They smell like fish. I don't like fish. I don't like them._

_The temple is in the caves, under the island. Everything smells like fish down there._

Fish, and rot. Kira had never thought anything of it; that scent was simply another part of the way everything was. She sent him what she hoped were calming thoughts.

"Lighthouse Keeper. Kylo Ren." The eldest Elder greeted them formally, with a broad smile, thin-lipped and toothy, and Kira caught a burst of horror from Kylo Ren which she soothed without thinking.

_You all have that accent?_

_What accent? We don’t have an accent, **you** have an accent._

_You know what, never mind. Anyway, he’s creepy, I don’t like his smile. And why do they all look the same?_

_That’s what people in the Community look like._

_What, they’re all blonde and blue-eyed and have creepy smiles ?_

_Yes._

_You don’t look like that. The other girls don’t look like that._

_That’s because we’re Outsiders._

Kylo Ren didn’t have time to respond before the eldest Elder started talking and she had to give him her full attention.

"Welcome to Ahch-To. We hope you find the accommodations to your liking," the oldest Elder said. "The Ceremony has begun. The Successors await. The Community is gathering for the celebration, and very soon, our Lighthouse Keeper and our Kylo Ren will be joined in the Sacrament of Matrimony, and we shall welcome another five years of abundance.” He grinned at them, and Kira saw him as Kylo Ren saw him; wrinkled, decrepit, and very, very pale.

The eldest Elder continued, droning on about life and redemption and the importance of sacrifice, and Kylo Ren nodded and smiled at them even as Kira could feel his roiling disgust and growing anger. Thankfully this part of the Ceremony didn’t last very long, and after only a few minutes the Elders made their departure. One of the middle-aged Elders explained with a grin that the Community was still gathering, and it would be a few minutes before it was time for them to come out, so they could have a few more minutes alone, and wouldn’t that be nice. Kira smiled in agreement while Kylo Ren’s stomach churned with nausea. 

Once The Elders were out and the door shut behind them, Kira released a heavy sigh and collapsed next to Kylo Ren on the bed. He grabbed her and pulled her to him, maneuvering her until she was beside him, her feet on the covers, her head leaning against his chest. The wind whistled outside, and Kira pushed her chilled body against Kylo Ren’s warm one.

“You wanted to tell me something,” Kylo Ren said, his breath hot against the top of her head. “What was it?”

“I wanted to tell you your name.”

His excitement spiked, warm through her heart, and tears pricked at her eyes. She closed them tightly, and turned her face to press it into the soft fabric that covered his heart. Despite his excitement his hands were gentle, one petting her hair, the other caressing the bare skin of her elbow.

“Will you?” He asked, his voice soft. “Will you please tell me my name?”

She wanted to, desperately. But it was _forbidden_. It was absolutely forbidden and once she told him it would be real - they would have to leave. It would be completely out of her control. 

“It’s already out of your control,” he whispered. He’d heard her thoughts, of course he had. 

“I’ll never get used to that, to having you in my head.”

“You will,” Kylo Ren whispered, pressing his cheek against her hair. “With any luck you’ll have years and years to get used to it.”

Kira’s face was wet, and she wiped her tears against his shirt. She felt sick to her stomach, and she shook with the dread of realization.

“They don’t love me.”

“They don’t.”

“They want me to die so they can live.”

“They do.”

She groaned into the warmth of his chest, gripping his tunic in her fist. He was so solid, and real, in a way that nothing had really been before. And she hadn’t even realized it.

“All my life they’ve told me that I was special, and important, but I’m just like a, uh,” she hiccupped, “a thing to play with. Like a doll. Or a dog, trained to sit and heel and roll over.”

“You’re not,” he replied, pushing back against her anguish with warm love, and holding her more tightly, his thumbs massaging her. “You’re so much more than that. You’re intelligent, and caring, and you’ve taken care of this lighthouse since you were ten years old. You do a good job with that, don’t you.”

It was odd praise, and she couldn’t help but laugh. “I do. The lighthouse is in better shape than it was when I came on, and I trained Helga well. She’s more than ready to...” her words trailed off, ending in a sob.

“Helga won’t need to do it. And neither will Gilda, or the little ones. You’ll be safe, all of you, once we get off the island.”

“Ben.”

He froze, and for a moment, Kira couldn’t breathe. “Excuse me?”

She pulled away so she could look him in the face. “Ben,” she said again, placing her hands against his cheeks. “Your name is Ben. Ben Solo. I don’t know where you live, you never told me, but it snows in the winter and it’s warm in the summer and you have a little house, and a garden, and you like to sit on the roof at night and look at the stars, and everything I know about constellations is because you taught me.” Once she started talking she couldn’t stop, she was talking and sobbing and she probably wasn’t making any sense because eventually Ben pulled her back into his arms and held her so tightly the beats of his heart were present in her own chest. But maybe that was the bond again. 

“Kira,” he whispered. “Kira.”

“Rey.”

“What?”

“Rey was my name. Kira is what they started calling me after I was selected, after the last Kira—”

“Don’t say it. _Rey_.” He said the name like it was a blessing. “My Rey. Okay?” He took her face in his hands as she had done to him a moment before, and gently pressed his lips to hers. “ _My_ Rey.”

“Yes,” she answered, and kissed him back. She couldn’t kiss him for long, though, because there was movement again outside the door. The Elders were back. Rey stood up and scrubbed her face, smoothed down her skirt and waited for the door to open.

If the Elder who came up to collect them noticed anything amiss he didn’t say anything; he simply stood by the door, holding it open while he waited for them. Rey helped Ben stand up, then crouched down to help him into a pair of soft white shoes, not much more than slippers. He was physically imposing, and she knew that he exercised regularly at home, running and lifting weights, but the potions she’d given him after his arrival had weakened him. She understood now that it was purposeful, on the part of the Elders, a plan from Sinnregin to keep him subdued, and she cursed them in her mind. 

Ben cursed them along with her, and she fought to control her external expressions. She loved their connection, feeling close to him in a way she never had with anyone else. She’d felt close to him in her dreams, too, but it was different having him here.

Once he was upright, she grasped his hand and led him, following the Elders out the door and down the winding staircase of the lighthouse. The Room was not at the top of the lighthouse, but it was close to the top, the next level down from the service room, kept ritually clean in preparation for the arrival of the Kylo Ren; there were several more turns before they would arrive at the bottom to greet the Community. On the way down they passed Rey’s home, the ground floor room that she shared with Helga, and she wondered if she would ever see it again.

They walked out the lighthouse door and onto the porch side by side, and Rey shivered. It had been sunny and warm earlier in the day, but a hauntingly familiar storm was brewing out over the ocean, and slate-colored clouds were gathering to block out the heat of the sun. The ocean itself had turned dark and was white with the froth of the surges. This was to be expected at this point of the Ceremony - it would die down once the task was over - but it was still uncanny and a bit frightening. Ben had noticed the changing weather, too; his discomfort was there, in their bond, and Rey reached out and gave his hand a squeeze. 

The entire Community was there, men and women and children, as the eldest Elder and Kylo Ren and the Lighthouse Keeper stepped out onto the balcony. The rest of the Elders were there, too, along with the Successors, Helga and Gilda, with Astrid, Evy, and Nina between them. The three were babies, really, and Rey’s stomach churned as she thought of what they had in store for them, whatever Sinnregin decided for their fate. Why had she not considered the horror of it before today? Because this arrangement - this was clearly horrific.

This time Ben sensed her discomfort, and he soothed it. She could not look at him, and she wanted to cry.

“Greetings, Friends!” the eldest Elder cried to the crowd, which responded with a shout of their own. “It has been one hundred and forty years since Sinnregin themselves led us, their chosen ones, here to the island of Ahch-To. Over those one hundred and forty years we have served them loyally. We have kept our bloodline pure, washed clean through the generous sacrifices of the Outsiders, chosen for us, and by our Lighthouse Keepers and their consorts, the Kylo Rens.” At the end of this address he made a noise in his throat, violent and wet, as though there were something inside of him crying to be released. But at that sound everyone in the crowd lifted a fist in the air, and every one of them made some variation of that terrible, uncanny noise. 

The eldest Elder continued. “It is now my great pleasure, indeed it is my honor to present to you, on behalf of Sinnregin, Kira, your twenty-eighth Lighthouse Keeper!” The crowd yelled, and cheered, and bile rose in Rey’s throat. “I present to you, your twenty-eighth Kylo Ren!” The crowd shouted, even louder, and the nausea in Rey’s stomach mixed with the sickness that came to her from Ben himself. She sent him calming thoughts, and others came to her from him, too, and things were better.

“In honor of Sinnregin, we present to the Lighthouse Keeper these gifts. Brought to her by Kylo Ren: a map." At this pronouncement a young man who had been standing at the front of the crowd below stepped up the stairs to the porch and placed a ragged piece of white paper into Rey’s hands. He bowed to her, a bit cheekily, and grinned. Ben’s annoyance prodded her through the bond. She ignored it, and did her best to return the young man’s smile. The paper had been folded up several times over and a couple of the seams were beginning to come apart, but it still held on. There was a drawing on it, and writing, in blue ink that was smeary, especially in the top left corner where the writing was densest. Rey refolded it into a square and tucked it into the pocket on the left side of her dress.

_What does he mean the map was brought to you by Kylo Ren?_

_You had the map with you when I pulled you onto the beach._

_Why did I have it?_

_I told you to bring it, and you did._

Ben was obviously confused but he didn’t have time to ask any more questions because the Elders were presenting her with another gift. “And from the Community: the Dagger of Dagon.”

This time a young woman came up from the front of the crowd. Like the rest of the people there her hair was very light and her eyes were blue and she was tall, so tall, a whole head taller than Rey, and sturdily built. But still she wore the same ritual clothing that all the women wore, stiff white fabric with purple-green tentacles lovingly embroidered around the collar and sleeves and the bottom hem of the skirt. Her hair had already been bedecked with seaweed during an earlier ritual that Rey had not been privy to, and her shoulders were damp and she smelled of salt and rot. She smiled down at Rey, her face full of affection. She held a white pillow on which sat a large dagger, about a foot long, carved entirely out of a very dark stone and a sharp edge that gleamed. Rey claimed the dagger, and the worn, brown leather scabbard that sat alongside it. While the Elders chanted in the language of Sinnregin, Rey sheathed the dagger in the special pocket, long and thin - made especially to house the dagger - on the right side of her dress. The blonde woman hopped up the last two steps and threw her arms around Rey, the little pillow bouncing against Rey’s shoulder as the other girl held her tight.

“I’ll miss you, Kira,” she whispered. “You’ve been a wonderful Lighthouse Keeper, and a great friend. Have a joyful, joyful wedding.” And then she said, in the ritual language of their deity, “ _Cahf ah nafl mglw'nafh hh' ahor syha'h ah'legeth, ng llll or'azath syha'hnahh n'ghftephai n'gha ahornah ah'mglw'nafh. Nilgh'ri vulgtmah ahornah ot_ Sinnregin.” Rey repeated the prayer and pulled away to look the woman in her face. She considered saying something, asking her to sneak away and meet them at the harbour, but she knew that would be a disaster. She was to be married to one of the Elders - the Daughter always married an Elder, it was part of the Ceremony - and her indoctrination was long and deep. So Rey hugged her a second time, and let her go.

The Elders ignored the slight breach in protocol, instead focusing on their own prayers. While they were so focused and as the woman returned to the crowd, Rey returned to thoughts of escape and considered the quick glance she’d had of the map before folding it away. Following custom she hadn’t looked at it when she’d removed it from his body on the beach, passing it directly to the Elders, but her excitement had spiked when she saw the route, which Ben had crudely drawn on a spare piece of printer paper in ballpoint pen on his kitchen table, only a few days before. He had told her, in a dream, that he had received the message from Sinnregin, the night before he left on the trip that ended here, on Ahch-To.

_I know the route. We can deviate. There are boats there. We can do it._

_That’s great, really great. Can you get the girls there?_

_I think so. They walk with us, at first. We can get the little ones, definitely. Gilda, too, I think. Helga might be more trouble._

_Are you sure you want to take them? Won’t they be sad, leaving their families?_

_They are like me, I told you. We’re Outsiders. We don’t have families; we were brought here from the mainland._

_Wait, you were kidnapped? And those other girls? All of you?_

_Yes, all of us, and each time a Daughter and Son, too._

_Do I even want to ask about the Daughter and Son?_

_The ones from the crowd. They gave me the map and the dagger. They stay in the Community. They help keep the bloodline fresh._

_Jesus Christ. This is so fucked up. Five of you kidnapped, every five years?_

_Kidnapped… no. We never thought about it that way. We were brought here to serve Sinnregin, to save the island. We’ve always known it’s why we were born._

_Fuck that, these sick fucks. Can’t even sacrifice their own children to their messed-up gods. We’ll get the kids, even if we have to carry them. Tell me where we go, when we run._

_There won’t be much time._

_We can do it. I believe in you, Rey. I’ll be with you all the way. I trust you._

_I’ll be with you too, Ben._

There were more announcements, but Rey was hardly paying attention. All she had to do was stand still, holding onto the hand of her Ben, and shout when she needed to shout. It was a simple enough task; his palm was warm, and his presence gave her hope. She only hoped her own presence did the same for him.

_Do whatever you need to. This is fucked up. All these people are fucking Aryans._

_What?_

_Aryans. Blonde and blue-eyed. Do you not see that? It’s like being at a fucking white supremacist rally or something._

Rey didn’t know what _fuck_ meant, or what a _white supremacist rally_ was, but looking down into the crowd, for the first time she noticed the pale complexions, the blonde hair, the tall, sturdy build of the gathered people. And she glanced over at the Successors, and she saw what Ben saw. She herself had light skin, but her hair was dark and her eyes were a greenish-brown ( _beautiful_ was what Ben thought of her eyes, and it made her blush), but Helga and Gilda were noticeably different. Helga was several inches shorter than Rey, and she had straight black hair and eyes that were almost as dark as her hair. Gilda, who at ten was almost as tall as Helga, had very dark skin, and her hair was so curly that the Elders kept it trimmed close to her skull because the women didn’t know how to style it. The smallest three likewise had neither light hair nor blue eyes. Rey thought back to the Lighthouse Keepers who had come before, and it had been the same as them. They all looked different from the rest of the Community. They _were_ different. 

Rey was still absorbing this epiphany when the crowd parted, the eldest Elder approached carrying a silver bucket. He stood behind her and with a shout dropped three handfuls of seaweed over her head. She gasped as the cold wetness dripped down behind her ears and soaked into the shoulders of her dress. The stuff was slimy and smelled of the ocean; several clumps slid off and landed at her feet with a _plop_ , but enough stayed that the Elder was satisfied, and the Community erupted in one final shout. Rey pushed the hanging weed out of her face and wiped the drops of water away from her eyes.

When it was quiet again the Elder touched her shoulder and whispered, “It’s time for you to go. The wind is getting high. The mercy of Sinnregin be with you all.”

He was right - the wind had picked up, and now blew cold and fierce, inland from the ocean. Rey gripped Ben’s hand harder and waited for the Successors to join them on the stairs. Then, together, they walked away from the lighthouse and the ocean behind it, through the parted crowd and the village, and towards the forest beyond.

* * *

Ben held tightly to Rey’s hand and shivered in the cold, salty breeze as their group made their way down the gravel path and past the gathered people. There were a lot of them, but he found it hard to focus. Were there fifty of them? A hundred? It looked like everybody was there, assembled around the small white clapboard houses with bright red roofs that made up the village. There were adults, younger and middle aged, and old men and women clutching the elbows of younger people, or leaning against crooked canes. There were also children, babies in the arms of their fathers and small children fisting at their mothers’ skirts. One small boy with a shock of yellow-white hair, about the same age as the smallest of the Successors, wiped away a tear and waved dejectedly as they walked by, but everyone else that Ben saw was smiling. They were joyful; sacrifice was at hand, and five years of abundance to follow. At one point they passed a large building with huge doors that opened on a single room, and past the people Ben could see tables decorated with white cloths and covered with platters of food. The rich scent of grilling meat wafted out and across the path, teasing them. Ben's stomach rumbled. How long had it been since he'd eaten? The cult was prepared for a celebration, and they hadn't even bothered to feed their sacrifice.

Waves of distress flowed to Ben from Rey and he did his best to send her encouragement, but it was hard. He knew logically that these people were her neighbors - acquaintances, maybe even friends. But looking at them nauseated him.

_Not my friends. Just… people, I guess._

Ben ventured a glance over at Rey. Her visage was stoic, and she stared straight ahead as they walked through the silent gathering, sadness and frustration rolling off of her in equal measure. The seaweed the Elder had dropped over her head up on the porch dripped onto her shoulders, and it stank. He gave her hand a squeeze, and she squeezed back.

_It’s funny. I’m completely surrounded by people, and yet I feel so alone._

_The other girls are here. And I’m here, too. I’m not leaving you, Rey. You’re not alone._

_Neither are you, Ben. I’m not leaving you, either_.

Rey’s voice sounded in his head, as they passed the last of the people and buildings, and picked their way off the gravel path, which curved left, around the forest and down a hill, and onto a more narrow dirt path that led past a farming area and then into the forest. Off to the left was a wide channel, with another piece of land on the other side, which extended far behind them before opening up to the ocean. They were too high up and far from that side of the island to see the water, but Ben could hear it, the churning surf echoing up and over. The clouds grew darker every moment, and they, too, swirled across the sky like a second ocean, a mirror image of the one below.

Between the edge of the village and the forest were fenced-in areas filled with livestock, sheep to the left and cows to the right. Each of these areas had a chicken coop in it, although the chickens themselves were nowhere to be seen.

 _It’s the weather. The chickens always go inside when the weather turns. We need to hurry_.

Rey picked up the pace and the others followed, and together they skipped the last hundred feet to the treeline. Once they were through the treeline they walked a few hundred yards before Rey brought them to a pause in a small clearing. The children who had been walking behind her and Ben came around to form a circle. They all held hands. Ben took the hand of one of the small girls, the one who had been introduced as Evy. Her hair was bright, the color of carrots, neatly plaited in two thick braids down her back. A dark shock of freckles danced across her nose, and her tiny hand was dwarfed by his own. A surge of protectiveness flooded through him, and Rey's answering warmth through the bond calmed his nerves somewhat.

After a moment's somber silence, Rey released his hand and passed Helga's hand to his, and stepped inside the small circle.

 _First we pray_.

_Do we have to?_

_If we want to get the girls to continue to follow us and not run back to the village? Yes, we have to. Trust me, Ben. Please._

_I do, Rey. I trust you._

The six girls closed their eyes and began to speak, but it was no language that Ben recognized. It was thick, guttural, and heavy with consonants that ran together in odd ways. Despite its ugliness the tone of the speech was melodic; they raised and lowered the pitch of the prayer together, practiced, in a way that reminded Ben of recordings he’d heard of Gregorian Chant. It was like that but backwards, sick, prayers made not to a benevolent God but to a rotten one; a god who would demand the lives of innocent children. It made Ben’s head throb and his stomach churn.

By the time Ben realized the prayer had ended his hands were empty and he was standing alone in the clearing. The wind whistled through the trees, inland from the ocean, crisp with just a hint of salty tang, and it lifted his hair off his brow. The girls were back on the path. Rey was examining the map while the others watched her expectantly, almost reverently. Without glancing at him, Rey’s voice came into his head.

_Are you well? The prayers can be an ordeal, for the uninitiated._

_Yeah, I’m okay. A bit lightheaded._

_That’s normal. It’s happened to all the other Kylo Rens before, too. You’ll be fine._

Ben shook the last of the cobwebs out of his head and walked over to join the others. It was cold, and they were all shivering, the smaller girls pulled close to the larger ones. He put a protective arm around Rey and she rested her head on his shoulder.

“I was just informing the Successors of the path we’ll take. We’ll be heading here, to the Rock By The Water.” She pointed her finger towards the bottom of the map, close to the coast, noticeably not where the map lines actually went - up, through the forest, towards what Ben guessed was some other clearing. But Rey was careful to keep the map from the eyes of the other girls, and they didn’t even appear curious, or ask to see it. They accepted Rey at her word, grabbed each other by the hand, and followed them silently into the forest.

The wind cut through the trees, making them shake and whistle. After a bit Ben heard a new noise, one not related to the trees; something deeper, darker. It reminded him of… something. A memory? Being lost, and a church, and a pipe organ being played in the dark. As he processed this thought, Rey’s head snapped to glance up at him.

_Was that a memory?_

_I think so. I don’t know. It wasn’t yours?_

She shook her head, almost imperceptibly.

_No. There’s nothing like that here. What was it?_

_It was, uh, a church. It’s a building. Where people worship._

_Like a temple?_

_Sort of. It’s for a specific religion, and that religion calls the places of worship church._

_Our temple is under the island. You can hear it now, if you listen._

_That noise. The whistling? That’s what made me remember the church._

A smile teased at the corner of Rey’s lips.

_Our temple sings for Sinnregin. Do all churches sound like that, when the wind blows?_

_No. Not all of them._

Their conversation was interrupted by a sudden crack, followed by a scream. A tree fell across the path with a crash. It was a pine tree - all the trees were pines - and although the fallen tree was thin, it blocked the path completely. The scream had been one of the smaller girls, and Ben glanced back to see Gilda holding Evy tightly in her arms.

“That was scary, wasn’t it,” the older girl cooed, while Evy wept against her shoulder. Gilda caught Ben’s eye and grimaced.

“That does not bode well,” he said aloud.

“To the contrary,” Rey replied, smirking at him, “it’s auspicious. The path we’re taking down to the Rock is here.” She gestured to the left, a few yards ahead of them - well before the fallen tree. Rey tugged on Ben’s hand, leading him down the new path, and the children followed them.

_That was lucky. If we were going where we’re supposed to go we’d be stuck._

_That wasn’t an accident. It always happens._

_Are you serious?_

_Yes. Falling trees, wild animals, lightning strikes. I’ve seen them all._

_But if your god wants the sacrifice, why make it difficult for you?_

_I never thought about it before, but now I wonder how much it’s just a game that Sinnregin plays to see if they can do it. A kind of a test, I suppose. Another way to keep us afraid, and obedient._

_That’s fucked up._

_What does that word mean?_

_Uhh, it has several meanings. I’ll explain the details later, but this time it’s not good._

_No, it’s really not, is it. Hold on. I’m going to need your help._

Rey stopped and turned around. The children stopped, too, and Helga frowned in confusion. The wind whistled through the trees and whipped the hair out of their braids.

“The storm is near!” Helga said. She had to nearly shout, to make herself clear over the sound of the wind. “Why are we stopping? We need to continue, to finish the Ceremony! We’re almost there!”

“We’re not doing the Ceremony today,” Rey answered. She stood tall, although her anxiety bled into Ben through their bond. She was terrified.

“What do you mean, you’re not doing the Ceremony?” the older girl repeated carefully, stepping closer to Rey, the small girl holding her hand - Nina, Ben thought her name was - following obediently. “You have to do the Ceremony. Everybody will die if you don’t.”

“And _we’ll_ all die if we do,” Rey answered, stepping toe-to-toe with Helga. “Every single one of us, eventually, will be sacrificed to Sinnregin so _those_ people can keep on living. It’s not _fair_ , Helga,” she cried out, the despair that roiled around her finally making itself heard. “I have my Kylo Ren and I love him, his name is _Ben_ and mine is _Rey_ and yours is _Rose_ and Gilda’s—”

Helga - Rose - lunged at Rey, who let go of Ben’s hand so she could hold her hands up to protect herself. But Rose didn’t try to tackle her; instead she reached for Rey’s right pocket, where she had placed the Dagger of Dagon when the Elders had given it to her on the porch of the lighthouse, not an hour before. By the time Ben realized what was happening it was too late; Rose brandished the dagger at them, which gleamed even in the gathering dark. One of the small children started to cry.

“My name is _Helga_ ; Sinnregin named me themselves. I am a Lighthouse Keeper. We are the Lighthouse Keepers!” Her voice was an eerie howl that met the wind and was lifted up along with it. “We trim the wick! We polish the lens! We tend to the foghorn!”

“We die for them!” Rey held her hands out and took a step back, but Rose followed her, holding the dagger upright between them. Rey reached over her head and snatched at the seaweed that still clung to her hair. She threw it to the ground and stomped on it. “We don’t have to do that! We can go down to the harbor, take a boat. We can leave, Ben will help us.”

“ _Kylo Ren_ ,” Rose spat. “You have yours. What about _my_ Kylo Ren? He was promised to me. Kira, the Ceremony is our duty. Our duty to the Community. That’s what we do. It’s why we were _born_.” Rose sobbed and her hand holding the dagger lowered to her side.

While Rose was distracted Ben took his chance, grabbing at Rose’s wrist in an attempt to subdue her, to get her to drop the dagger. But Rose was quick, too, and she lunged forward. Rey stepped out of the way, grabbing at Rose’s arm to keep the dagger from plunging into Ben’s chest, but she wasn’t quite fast enough. The edge of the blade caught Ben across his right cheek. It was cold, and it stung. One of the small children howled into the wind. He readied himself for another attack but it didn’t come; Rey’s hand was on Rose’s forehead and the girl was slumping in her arms. The dagger fell to the ground with a clatter, and Rey kicked it into the scrub at the other side of the path.

"I forgot you could do that," Ben said, impressed, but Rey shook her head.

“Your face…” she said instead, as Ben reached for Rose and slung her over his shoulder. He touched fingers to his cheek; they came back wet and red with blood. 

“I’ll worry about it later,” he said, doing his best to sound brave even though he knew Rey could sense his fear and pain. “Let’s get to the harbor.”

Rey tended to the other girls, who put up no further argument, and they left the path to complete their trek to the harbor, and to the channel and the mainland beyond.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The cult religion of the villagers is influenced by H. P. Lovecraft's story _[The Shadow Over Innsmouth](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Shadow_over_Innsmouth)_ , in which a coastal village worships a sea god named [Dagon](https://lovecraft.fandom.com/wiki/Dagon) and the villagers interbreed with fish people. As is typical for Lovecraft, the fish people and the villagers are stand-ins for human minorities and the plot depends on Lovecraft's fear of nonwhite people, and this made a problem for me; I didn't want to make the villagers into "fish people" because I feel like that replicates Lovecraft's racism. I thought very hard about how to handle that aspect of the story, and what I decided to do is to invert it, so the cult - the "other" of the story - is centered around white supremacy. (As I am preparing to post this on AO3 I've just watched the first two episodes of _Lovecraft Country_ which does something similar, and if you enjoy this story I encourage you to check it out!)
> 
> While I was in this brainstorming phase I talked to my friend Angie about it, and she suggested a second influence for the cult: [_The Coming Race_](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vril), a novel by Edward Bulwer-Lytton which was first published in 1871. The novel is about a man who travels into the earth, which is hollow, and meets a race of subterranean dwellers, beings who are more advanced than humans which use a force called "vril." The book was popular in Germany and helped inspire Nazi mysticism. 
> 
> So imagine, if you will, a universe where some 19th century white supremacist, proto-Nazi Germans took that book very seriously and set themselves up on a little island on the coast of Canada soon after the book became popular. They made themselves a god to worship, naming the god and the sacrifices after Norse gods (another influence on white supremacists from the 19th century through today), expecting their cult to be related to vril but end up worshipping Dagon instead. That is this story. I hope you like it!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are at the end! There are no warnings for this chapter outside of what is covered in the tags. Thank you for reading and I hope you find the ending satisfying ❤️

From their current location there was no way to pick up a direct path without going out of their way, so instead they cut through the forest, picking down the slope, being careful not to slide on the underbrush. They had to move slower than Rey would have liked, since a still slightly unsteady Ben was now carrying Rose. Rey was upset about Rose; she’d expected some argument, though she hadn’t expected her friend to go for the dagger. But their indoctrination had run deep, and Rey knew how hard it was to even begin to get your head out of it. Without Ben by her side, she couldn’t have done it herself. She didn’t blame Rose - what about her Kylo Ren? If the island really were destroyed by Sinnregin _,_ what would become of the bonds of the other girls? Would Rose and Gilda continue to dream of their Kylo Rens? Would one of the younger ones have a dream tomorrow, or would the failed Ceremony make it all disappear? Would she lose her bond with Ben? The thought made her want to vomit. 

The thought upset Ben, too, Rey sensed it, but there wasn’t really time to dwell on it. They crunched along slowly, and it wasn’t until she heard the people shouting in the distance that Rey realized the wind had died down. Ben spoke to her through their bond, perhaps not wishing to break the silence.

_Is that the cult?_

_It’s the Community, yes._

_Why are they yelling?_

_Because the wind is quiet._

_Why are they yelling about that?_

_Sinnregin are pleased that blood has spilled. The first part of the Sacrament of Matrimony._

_That’s good. Buys us some time._

Rey didn’t answer, and Ben glanced over at her. She kept her eyes straight ahead, but she could see him out of the corner of her eye. The cut on his face was ugly, although she didn’t think it was actively bleeding. It was drying to a dark red, with lighter smears up to his ear and down his chin. Rey’s right hand gripped the much smaller hand of Nina, who she had taken in hand after she’d knocked out Rose. The little girl had finally stopped crying, although she was still sniffling and wiping her eyes. Rey promised herself to give the girl a good snuggle once they were safe - all the girls deserved that. Rey glanced back at Gilda, who walked slightly behind with Evy on her hip, Astrid holding her other hand. The little girls looked frightened, but at least they weren’t crying. The older girl caught Rey’s eye and gave her a smile, which she returned before glancing back at Ben. His voice in her head was excited, frustrated.

_Why are you nervous? We’re almost to the harbor, aren’t we? We have time, don’t we?_

_The only blood spilled was yours, and we no longer have the dagger with us. Sinnregin are canny, and powerful, and we won’t be able to fool them for long. We need to hurry._

Very soon after, they reached a path that cut across and continued down the hill, where Rey knew it would end at the southern side of the harbor. On the path they could walk faster, and they did, bouncing to a jog on the downward slope. As long as they could get to a boat before the Community figured out what was going on, or Sinnreginfigured out what they’d done. Rey had no idea what the deity would do or could do, but she couldn’t imagine it would be anything good. They could be cruel and fickle. They once caused a flock of lambs to escape their pen and throw themselves off the cliff when one of the Elders got sick and missed a sacrifice. The animals that hadn't broken their necks in the fall had drowned, and the loss had been felt dearly. There had barely been enough meat and wool to last through the season, and the Elder's screams had been heard echoing up from the temple for days as he paid penance for his mistake. Rey herself had helped tend to many fires caused by dropped lanterns, or lightning strikes, or nothing at all. And then there were the smaller things; lenses misplaced, then reappearing days, weeks, sometimes even months later covered with grime and strange prints, less like fingers and more like the suckers that dotted the delicate tendrils of the little cephalopods that they pulled out of the shallows down by the temple and burned in the moonlight in honor of Sinnregin _._

The harbor, set at the bottom of a steep hill, consisted of a few sheds surrounding a short wooden pier. Rey stopped and Ben came to rest beside her, switched Rose to his other shoulder, and they both glanced up the other path, the one that led up around the forest and back towards the village. The Community was there, waiting for the storm to end, for the clouds to clear and the sun to come back out. When that was done they would dance, and sing, and feast, and the Daughter and the Elder would be joined in their own matrimony. They wouldn’t even wait for the Successors to return before they started, although they would make sure the young ones would be well-fed after their ordeal. Nausea crept into Rey’s gut as she thought about it.

_Not today._

_Never again_.

The Community’s small utility boat was tied to the end of the pier, right where Rey knew it would be, and they piled into it. It wasn’t designed to carry a large number of people, most of the twenty feet was open for cargo. Ben stepped in and laid Rose down carefully on the floor just behind the driver's seat, but Gilda hesitated. Rey put an arm around her shoulder.

“Are you okay, Gilda?”

“Do you really think this is the right thing to do?”

“I know it is. We’ll stay together, and we’ll be far away from here.”

“No more lighthouse?”

“No more lighthouse.”

Gilda raised a hand to her head and touched the dark hair that curled against her scalp. “Can I grow my hair?”

“Of course. You can have your hair however you like.”

“Can I call myself Jannah again?”

“Yes.”

The girl smiled at her, trusting. “Okay.” Rey hoped Gilda’s - Jannah's - trust wasn't misplaced.

Jannah stepped into the boat, and helped Evy and Astrid clamber in with her. Jannah sat so Rose’s head could rest in her lap, and the other children sat around her. Ben took the driver’s seat, and as Rey lifted Nina into the boat, she unlooped the rope tethering the boat to the pier, then climbed up to the front and sat down beside him, pulling Nina into her lap.

“Do you know what you’re doing?”

He stared at the controls for a moment before he set one hand on the wheel and flipped a switch, which made the boat shudder and shake under her feet.

“Not sure,” Ben finally replied. “It’s familiar, though.” He gripped a handle that poked out of the side of the boat and pushed it forward. The boat lunged into the churning water, then smoothed out as they moved farther from shore and the boat picked up speed.

“Familiar enough, I guess,” Rey said to him, yelling over the noise of the engine and the wind. 

“There’s a harbor on the other side, I can see it there,” Ben pointed, and then Rey could see it too, a lower point among the cliffs, a pier and a small beach beside it. “We’ll aim for that point. Okay?”

“Okay,” Rey answered, reaching over to grab his elbow, his hands both on the wheel of the boat.

The going was easy for the first few minutes. The sky was still grey and the water frothed roughly at the bow of the boat, but Ben had them heading straight for the little harbor on the other side, and Rey allowed herself to relax a little. Hope bloomed in her chest.

Suddenly there was a shout from behind them. “Kira? Something’s wrong.”

Rey turned around to see Jannah, Rose’s head still in her lap, staring up the channel, in the direction of the ocean. Evy, leaning heavily against her, was sucking her thumb, and behind her Astrid fisted Jannah’s skirt and pointed.

“Kiki, look at the water,” the little girl said, looking back and Rey with a frown. “Where’s it going? Not down the drain. It’s going out there.”

It was only then that Rey noticed that the water was receding, and quickly, too. At the same moment a sudden burst of wind swept through the channel, pushing the water towards the ocean, and the boat along with it. The sky, which had continued to lighten during the time they’d been out on the channel, turned dark again, as quickly as blowing out a candle. It was as though the clouds appeared suddenly from out of nowhere, sent from some other world into their own. 

Rey contemplated the disappearing water with horror, and Ben swore and fought to keep the boat aimed at the mainland harbor, even as the currents pulled them past it. The wind suddenly vanished, and a cry rose up from the island behind them, an eerie sound through the channel silent without water nor wind. But this wasn’t a cry of joy; it was a wail of fury, one hundred voices strong. 

The boat stopped suddenly; the water had left them tipped awkwardly in the middle of the channel. They all sat and watched as the water rushed away, being sucked out towards the mouth of the bay as though through a giant straw.

“We need to go.” Ben nodded across the now empty channel, to the rocky shore on the other side. “We need to get there.”

Rey breathed deeply, trying to control the hysteria growing in her, like she was running out from the temple through the tunnels in the roots of Ahch-To, desperate to reach that sunlight at the end but despairing of ever reaching it.

“There’s no water, Ben. No water, no boat.” She pulled Nina closer to hear, taking comfort in the girl’s small, warm body in her lap.

“We’re gonna have to walk, and we need to hurry.”

Rey hated it, but Ben was right. She gave Nina a quick hug and looked over at Jannah.

Jannah nodded, took the hands of Evy and Astrid, and they all watched Ben pick up Rose and heave her over his shoulder. Then they followed him out of the boat and into the empty channel.

* * *

Ben guessed that they were still about a half mile from the harbor. By himself, walking at his normal pace on the sidewalk, he could walk that distance in five minutes. With Rose over his shoulder, and with Rey and Jannah tending to the smaller children, he guessed it would take at least twice that time. Maybe three times. Fifteen minutes, maybe twenty. Did they even have twenty minutes? The water was gone. It would eventually come back, and when it did it would drown them all, if they couldn't make it to the shore. Rey’s voice in the bond broke through his worry.

_Stop thinking about it. Just walk._

Once they’d maneuvered themselves out of the grounded boat and into the bottom of the channel, Rey’s side of the bond went disturbingly calm. 

_I can’t simply turn off my brain. How are you doing that?_

_Years of training. I don’t recommend it._

Despite himself, Ben chuckled at her joke, and her warmth wafted over him.

_Just walk, Ben. Keep your eyes on the opposite shore, mind where you’re stepping, and keep walking._

Within a few minutes the sky was completely covered with dark, roiling clouds, buffeting violently in the savage wind. They found it was easiest to walk in a tight group, with Rey on one side and Ben on the other, even though it slowed them down. Ben could still hear the cultists’ screams, or he imagined he could, although he refused to look back at them. He could imagine them, rushing down the hill in their ceremonial dress, howling and bloodthirsty. He’d been sure they would follow them into the channel, once the water was gone, but they hadn’t, electing instead to scream at them from the island’s shore.

_Why aren’t they following us?_

_Because leaving the island is forbidden, unless you are going to the mainland to shop. And even then, only the Elders are permitted to go. The rules are very strict._

_Lucky for us._

It wasn’t long before Ben could no longer hear the screams of the cultists; the wailing of the wind drowned out every other sound. He could barely hear his own thoughts. But Rey was there, warm through the bond, and he held onto that connection as they continued their slow, muddy trek across the channel.

As the opposite shore grew closer and closer, Ben allowed his mind to wander. It wandered to Rey, to those precious bits and pieces of her from before that he could remember, which were still few. There was one that he kept returning to: Rey naked, writhing in the moonlight. It was one of the very first memories he had of her, from after he first woke up in the lighthouse, only hours before.

 _I remember that_.

Rey’s presence was sweet in his head, and his face flushed hot despite the chill of the wind.

_Do you know what I’m thinking about?_

_I do. You’re thinking about me. The night I took off my clothes for you._

_You did it for me? Why?_

_You asked me to. You said you’d never seen a real woman naked, so I showed you._

_Have you ever seen a man naked?_

The warmth in the bond turned to heat, and it gave Ben strength. He shifted Rose on his shoulder and straightened his spine.

_I haven’t. But I’d like to._

_I’d like to show you._

_Soon._

They walked and walked and walked, the bottoms of Ben’s soft white shoes were sopping wet and caked with freezing mud, while the wind screamed and the dark clouds roiled across the sky. The water was still nowhere to be seen. He kept his eyes on the opposite shore, on that little harbor with the beach, and thought about Rey’s naked body and what he wanted them to do together, and he walked, one foot after the other.

They were close, only yards away, when a person ran down the incline to the little beach, and started coming towards them.

_Do you think that person will help us?_

_I sure hope so._

A second person appeared, following close behind the first, and then a large van slowly drove down and came to a stop on the beach.

Ben thought there were three men, two of them making their way towards them across the muddy ground, and a third behind the wheel of the van. The two he could see were dressed for hiking, in jeans and boots and padded jackets. One of them was Black, with his hair in twists that stuck up from the top of his head; his orange jacket was so bright Ben’s eyes squinted spontaneously. The other one wore a black watch cap with ginger strands peeking from underneath. The men had the advantage of speed, and it didn’t take long for them to catch up to the group. 

“Are you guys okay?” The man in the orange jacket asked, as the two men changed direction so they could walk with them towards the harbor. “Something’s wrong, we saw...the water’s all gone out, you shouldn’t be down here.” He glanced at Rey, apparently taking her in for the first time. “Hey, did you fall in? You’ve got seaweed…” he gestured at his own head, but then he looked at Ben and his eyes widened. “Shit, man, you’re bleeding. And you’ve got… damn, is she okay?”

“We’re okay, she didn’t fall in, it’s just a scratch, she passed out,” Ben growled. “We were in the boat.” He did his best to keep a hold of Rose while he gestured with his chin behind them in the direction of where they’d discarded the boat.

“Okay. What on earth were you doing out on a boat ride in weather like this, anyway? It’s been looking like a storm for hours. With a bunch of kids? Dressed like you’re going to a garden party?” His tone was accusatory, and Ben rankled under it, but Rey pointed down at Evy, who was holding onto one of Jannah’s hands.

“You can help by carrying her, okay? We _know_ we shouldn’t be here. We came from the island.”

The man frowned at her, but gamely gave Evy a little hello before picking her up and balancing her on his hip. “Island?” He was confused, and he looked over and shrugged at his friend, the man with the ginger hair, who looked even more confused, although he seemed to be especially distracted by Rose, slung over Ben’s shoulder.

“What island are you talking about?” The ginger-haired man asked, his voice a lilting Irish brogue. “There aren’t any islands in the bay.” 

Ben stopped, on the verge of losing his temper, and pointed behind them. “ _That island_. The big island. The one with the lighthouse. The one that’s right there!” But when he turned back to look at it, he gasped in shock. 

There was no island. It was gone, disappeared. There was only the vast expanse of the bay, naked and muddy, all the way to the far shore, many miles off. And at the head of the bay, where it met the ocean, was a wall of water, higher than the cliffs that edged the bay. It loomed there, silent and still, a mile high or more, many miles across. As they stood and watched, still not over the sight of the missing island, the wall of water began to move.

“Look, Kiki,” Evy said, letting go of the man’s arm to point at it. “The water’s coming back!”

“Holy shit,” the man said. "Come on! Fuck!”

The ginger-haired man first approached Ben, but he pushed him towards Jannah, so he picked up Astrid and took Jannah by the hand. Then all of them ran toward the van waiting at the shore. The third man had opened the sliding door on the side of the van, and he was jumping up and down beside the vehicle, shouting encouragement as the others made their way as quickly as they could across the slick, muddy ground. Ben’s heart was in his throat and his feet were numb with cold and was afraid he might slip more than once, but by some miracle they all made it to the shore in a matter of minutes. 

* * *

They all clambered inside the van. Jannah and the small children went first, and at the driver’s insistence they crowded into the second row, on a long bench. Ben went next, and laid Rose on the first long bench with a groan. The others followed, the man in the orange jacket slipped past Rose and the girls into the far back seat, but the ginger-haired man crouched next to Rose’s head, and Ben slumped on the ground next to him, exhausted. Rey climbed over and into the front seat, beside the driver. 

“Hold on tight, everybody!” The driver shouted, and the van jumped to life and momentarily spun its wheels before taking off up the gravel drive to the coastal road above. The angle of the drive had them pointing in the direction of the opening of the bay, but at the sight of the wave bearing down he swore and turned the van around, so they drove away from the approaching wave rather than towards it. The ride was rough and the van eerily silent aside from the noise of the engine and the crunch of the occasional gravel beneath the tires, the scream of the wind outside and the sound that overwhelmed all of them; the howling surge of the incoming sea. 

Rey had never seen such a thing, had never imagined it. The wall of water slid relentlessly into the bay, gaining speed as it went. Everything - the stones and mud and the occasional wrecked boat - disappeared under its churning foot, a barricade of froth six miles long and as tall as a city building. As it advanced its speed increased; it reminded Rey of the mudslide a couple of years previous, which had decimated the high point of the island and flooded part of the temple, killing several people in the process.

It was too big; it was going to kill everyone and everything in its path. They couldn’t possibly drive fast enough to escape it. 

The driver pushed the van to its limit, the engine whining painfully under them.

“Come on, baby, you can do it,” he muttered, his eyes fixed on the narrow road.

The others all stared out the van’s windows, the air heavy with the collected tension, at the sight of the ocean bearing down on the naked floor of the bay. And at something else. 

“Look, Kiki!” Evy hopped up and down on her seat, pointing out her window. “Ahch-To is back! It’s back! Look, they’re waving at us! Hello, everybody!” Jannah tutted and pulled the little girl’s hand down.

The island was back. Whatever power had hidden it from mainland view had dissipated, and the van filled with the sound of their collective gasp.

“Well I’ll be damned,” said the man in the back seat. The driver laughed and struck the heel of his palm against the steering wheel. The ginger-haired man, was losing his patience, crouched next to Rose, stroking the back of her hand, and he shouted over his shoulder.

“Drive faster, Poe! Faster!” 

“This van is twenty years old, asshole, I’m driving as fast as I can!”

They didn’t argue any more after that, because the wave hit the end of the island. The Lighthouse exploded, bricks and glass turning to dust in seconds before being immediately swallowed by the hungry water. The village was next, the entire thing gone in a matter of seconds, and then the farm - sheep, lambs, chickens, all of them disappearing behind the wall of water. 

It hit the forest at about the same time it reached the harbor, where the entire Community was gathered, crowding over the pier and on the roofs of the shacks and up both paths and into the woods, one hundred people or more still pointing and screaming at them across their channel, waving their fists in fury. Rey wasn’t even sure if they noticed the wave before it hit them, a brief burst of red that became one with the water, just like everything else. The trees put up a fight, but even they were no match for the unrelenting violence of Sinnregin. 

The driver was doing the best he could, but the van’s old engine was no match for the speed of the ocean. But as the wave progressed towards their current location, Rey realized that it only touched the floor of the bay and the island inside it. Although the wall of water was still higher than the cliffs surrounding it - it was no longer a mile high, not nearly so high as it had been only moments before. It appeared to have intentionally released much of its mass on the island, and did not overflow the bay that surrounded it. It caught up to them, and then passed them, the sound even more overwhelming than the songs for Sinnregin when you’re in the depths of the temple and you can’t escape it or even think. The giant wave sprayed the van, no worse than a spring shower, although the power of its passing caused the van to rock violently. But it did not knock them over, nor did it suck them into the depths. Once it was past them Poe hit the brakes and rolled to a stop, and they watched as the wave continued its journey to the farthest inner corner of the bay, where it unfolded the very last bit of itself, laying down almost gently as though it was ready for a long nap.

By the time the water in the bay stilled completely the wind had died down and the clouds vanished as quickly as they’d appeared, leaving a spotless, blue, and sunny sky. Rey looked out through the back window and squinted into the calm waters of the bay. The forest, the Community, the lighthouse, Ahch-To itself - there was no sign of any of it. No detritus floating in the water, no bodies, no mud, merely a vast expanse of clear blue, all the way across the bay and out into the darker grey of the ocean.

The van was filled with an awkward silence. 

The driver cleared his throat and turned around in his seat. “Is everybody okay?” 

“I’m good!” the man in the orange jacket said from the very back of the van, giving a thumbs up. "This day so far has been incredibly fucked up, but I myself am a-okay. I’m Finn, by the way." He gave Rey a little wave as she peeked at him from between the front seats.

“And I’m Poe,” said the driver. He offered Rey his hand but she simply stared, unsure of what to do with it, and he pulled it back. “And that’s Hux.” He pointed at the ginger-haired man, who wasn’t paying any attention to them at all, entranced as he was by the unconscious Rose. Rey had an inkling, and she wasn’t sure how she felt about it.

“I’m Rey,” she said, giving Poe a tight smile. “That’s Jannah, Evy, Astrid, and Nina.” The four of them, clustered together in the middle seat, were shaken but not crying, and they all gave soft hellos. Evy imitated Finn’s thumbs up. He reached over the seat and gently took her hand and helped her form it into a fist.

“Nah, Evy, hold your fingers together like this, thumb straight up. There you go.” Evy giggled and showed it off to the other two, who gleefully imitated her.

Rey pointed at Ben, crouched on the floor, his face caked with blood and his legs caked in mud. “That’s Ben.”

Ben didn’t react, and he wasn’t looking at Poe. He was staring at Rey, his eyebrows drawn together, corners of his mouth turned down.

_Rey?_

_Hey. You’re still there._

_So are you._

The now-familiar warmth flooded the bond, and Ben’s concern melted into a smile that was so pure and bright it threatened to blind her. 

Poe interrupted, clearing his throat again loudly. “And who’s that?” He pointed down at Rose, who was just beginning to stir. 

“I think it’s Helga,” Hux said quietly before Rey could say anything. He looked up at Rey. “Isn’t it.” Rey nodded. Hux returned to gazing at Helga. “I thought so. She looks different, outside of my dreams, if that makes sense. I’m afraid that doesn’t make sense.”

“It makes sense to me,” Ben said.

“So yeah,” Rey said, smiling shyly at Poe. “To answer your question, I think we’re okay.”

The van was filled with a few seconds of silence before it was broken by a surprised, “Hey!” Rose sat up on her elbow. “Where are we? What happened?”

“Helga,” the ginger-haired man said, his voice full of wonder. 

“Wait. Kylo…? _Hux_!” Rose shouted, and fell into his arms. “What are you doing here?”

“I was on holiday with my friends, Poe and Finn. I guess we were in the right place at the right time.”

“Wow,” she said, glanced up at Rey, and smiled. Then she got a look at Ben and grimaced. “Er, sorry about that. Kylo. Uh... Ben?”

“It’s okay,” he answered, the left corner of this mouth turned up. “I forgive you. Helga.”

“Oh no.” She looked back up at Hux, who was holding on to her as though he never wanted to let her go. “Call me Rose. Please?”

Hux nodded, a bit confused, but then Rose snuggled into his lap, and he didn’t look so bothered after that.

For her part, Rey laughed. She laughed, and then she cried, and Ben reached into the front seat and pulled her back, into his arms. He held her there in his lap, on the dirty floor of the old van, while she clung to his tunic, alternating between sobs and laughter while the children giggled, and Poe drove them away from the water. 

* * *

Once they were several miles away from the coast they pulled into a parking lot and took stock. The men in the van, it turned out, were in the area for a holiday. Poe and Finn were visiting from Toronto, more than a day’s drive away, but Hux - who was apparently Rose’s Kylo Ren, as strange as that was - lived much closer, so they decided to head to his house, a few hours away.

“You should really take the kids to the police,” Finn insisted for the third or fourth time, Rey tending to Ben’s wound as he sat in the door to the van. Poe had taken Jannah and the other kids into the store - a big store, bigger than any store Rey could have even imagined - to clean up a little and use the restroom. Hux and Rose had gone in, too, but they only had eyes for each other. “Their parents must be worried sick. _Your_ parents must be worried sick. Gone for twenty years? Come on.”

“Just one night,” she insisted - also for the third or fourth time, taping the last of the gauze to Ben’s cheek and pressing a kiss to his forehead. “Please. One more night for us to all be together.”

And that’s what they did. 

They arrived at Hux’s house as the sun was going down. He cooked dinner for everybody, a huge pot of spaghetti, which the children slurped down with delighted giggles and the adults supplemented with hunks of chewy bread and glasses of red wine that made Rey sleepy. 

“It’s been a long day,” Ben whispered to her over the din of everybody else. “We should go to bed.”

The heat from Ben’s body warmed her, but the heat through the bond warmed her more.

“The children first,” she insisted, and she and Jannah followed Hux to a room that had one big bed in it and another bed under that one, which he pulled out like a drawer. He called it a trundle bed, and Evy and Nina immediately claimed it, leaving Jannah and Astrid to the big bed. Hux handed out clean tee shirts, which hung to the girls’ knees, and they all took turns in the bathroom. When they were tucked in Rey told them a story, one she made up, about a group of girls who go into a forest afraid and come out the other side as brave as warriors, but they were all asleep before she finished.

The door to the next room was open, and Ben was in there, sitting on the bed, flipping through a softcover book. He set it down on the little table beside him when he saw her standing in the doorway.

“Hey, how are the kids?”

“They’re good. Asleep.” Ben smiled, a little off-center because of the gauze and tape across his cheek. “How’s your cut? Still hurt?”

“Not hurt. Just a little itchy.” He lifted his fingers to press against it, and Rey walked around the side of the bed and sat next to him.

“Do you know where the others are?”

“Finn and Poe are in the basement watching TV. Last I saw Hux and Rose they were passed out on the sofa in the living room. Uh,” he looked slightly embarrassed, “she’s a little bit young, I think he’s weirded out about that. But he likes her.”

Rey smiled and took Ben’s hand. It was warm, and so large it dwarfed hers. He was large; she felt safe with him. “She’ll get older. If they decide they want to be together, they have time.”

He gave her hand a squeeze. “ _Time_.”

Rey and Ben had time, too, but they didn’t want to waste a minute of it. They helped each other out of their borrowed clothes, Hux’s ill-fitting tee shirts and shorts and sweatpants. Rey tried not to stare, but she couldn’t really help it. Ben caught her eye, and he was smug.

“You said you’d never seen a man naked.”

“I did.”

“Do you like it?”

“I do.”

With that they burrowed down under the blankets together, and Ben turned out the lamp. 

Tomorrow they would go to the police, start the process of finding the girls’ families. Rey hoped that they would all have families waiting for them, mothers and fathers and sisters and brothers ready to take them in and hold them close. Rey could hardly wrap her mind around the idea that there might be such people waiting for her, but whatever happened, she knew this for certain: she had Ben, he was all she needed, all she wanted, and she was going to stay with him for as long as she possibly could. 

Under the cover of darkness Rey and Ben gently discovered each other. Ben’s hands were large and gentle, his body was warm and gave deliciously under her curious fingertips, and he drank her in like a man who had been away from water for so long he’d forgotten how to sip. They consumed each other until they were full, and then they rested, and then they woke up and did it again. 

Ben saved her, Rey realized as he kissed down her neck, the dim light of dawn just beginning to peek in past the window curtains. 

“You saved me,” he replied as he laid her on her back and prepared to take her again. “We saved each other.”

They had saved each other. Rey and Ben, _Sinnregin_. The saviors.

**Author's Note:**

>  _Sinnregin_ is not a real word, I created it by mashing together two words from Old Norse: _sinn_ , meaning own, one's own, and _regin_ , meaning powers, rulers, gods. The implication is that the god has been created by the people who worship it - although it's no less real for being imaginary.
> 
> The given names of Rey and the other sacrificial girls are also from Old Norse.
> 
> Kira (Kyrra) - from the Old Norse _kyrr_ , meaning quiet  
> Helga - from the Old Norse _heilagr_ , meaning holy, sacred  
> Gilda - from the Old Norse _gildi_ , meaning recompense, return; payment due, tribute, offerings or compensation  
> Thus the Lighthouse Keeper is a quiet, sacred offering.
> 
> * * *
> 
> The island in this story is a fictional version of [Bell Island](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bell_Island_\(Newfoundland_and_Labrador\)), which is located (as Rey says) in Conception Bay, Newfoundland and Labrador, Canada. Bell Island isn't forested but this is my story so I gave the island a forest typical for that part of Canada. The island does have a lighthouse! I think the lighthouse in our story is something like this but perhaps a bit larger.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed the story! Kudos and comments mean the world to me, please leave one if you are willing. You can also find me on [Twitter (@flowerofcarrots)](https://twitter.com/flowerofcarrots) and for the shy I have a [CuriousCat](https://curiouscat.qa/flowerofcarrots).


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